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I can still remember exactly what it was like before I learned some of the secrets of how to meet women. I have very clear memories of women that I saw literally YEARS ago who I wanted to meet... but I just didn't know what to do or how to do it. In some of the cases, I was actually talking to the girl, enjoying a conversation... and REALLY wanting to ask her for her number... but I just didn't do it. But WHY? Why didn't I just say "Hey, give me your number?" The fact is that I was AFRAID. I was afraid that I'd say the wrong thing, or that the woman I was talking to would say "no", or that I'd offend her... or whatever. At the time, I always assumed that this was some kind of strange curse that I had. I was afraid of women, and didn't know what to say to them, and I was ALONE. In other words, I not only felt like I had a SERIOUS insecurity issue and fear, but even WORSE, I didn't feel like I could TELL anyone about it... or get help. I felt like a dork if I even MENTIONED the topic to other guys... as if even talking about it made it clear that I was a loser who didn't deserve even an answer. So here I was, over and over again, in situations where I would see women I wanted to meet... but I just didn't know what to do. And I didn't know what would happen if I DID do something. I was afraid of the unknown.Eventually, this led me to believe that there was probably something wrong with ME that I should just accept and deal with... and that I'd probably wind up either alone or having to settle for a relationship with a woman I wasn't attracted to. Ever been there? THE REALITY OF THE SITUATION... Well, when I finally made the decision to learn about how to meet women on MY terms, I made it my goal to learn how to get women's phone numbers. I "naturally" assumed that if I was able to get a woman's number, that would be the key. That was the "hard part" to me. If I could approach women and get their numbers quickly, I thought I would be "The Man". So I went to work. Here's what I learned... To begin with, I learned that most women will respond somewhere between "neutral" and "positive" to being "approached" by a man. Explained differently, out of the hundreds and hundreds of times that I've started conversations with women and seen my friends start conversations with women, I have VERY, VERY rarely seen a woman respond by getting upset, saying something rude, or acting offended. The typical worst case scenario is a woman not even stopping and just walking away, or responding coldly. And like I said, this is a typical WORST case. Another important lesson that I learned is that when a woman responds in a way that is something other than positive and receptive, it's usually about HER, not about ME. In other words, either she's not a nice person, she's not available, she's in a hurry, she's in a bad mood, or whatever... things that aren't within my control, and that aren't my fault (or problem). I also realized that I was CAUSING a major problem for myself without even realizing it... I used to have this idea that it would be better if a woman didn't think that I was "interested" in her. I thought that if I could figure out a way to start a conversation and make her like me because I was a "nice guy", then I could somehow get her to see me in a "more romantic" light later on. HUGE MISTAKE. Little did I know, but women ASSUME that you're interested in MORE than friendship from the very beginning, no matter WHAT you do or say. So when you try to act all innocent and friendly, like you just want to be friends, women usually assume that you're HIDING something, or that you're just another major Wuss Boy... This is a bad thing. I learned that it is FAR better to make no excuses at all and NEVER try to cover up the fact that you're approaching her. Later on, as you're talking to her over tea or coffee, and you're teasing her, making fun of her, and busting on her, SHE'LL start to wonder on her own what the hell is going on... which is perfect. In the beginning, just be damn good at what you're doing... and don't try to cover it up or pretend. Pretending that you're a nice, friendly guy who's only starting an innocent conversation is a direct express route to an evening of self touching. THE GOODS... OK, so here are a few pointers and updates: 1) It's OK To Ask Immediately... It STILL amazes me that a woman will give her phone number and/or email address to a guy after only a minute or two of conversation. But it's true. If you act cool about it, so will she. Do this: After talking for a minute or two, say "I'm going to get back to my friends" (Or whatever you were doing), and then turn away from her and begin to leave. If you're getting ready to actually LEAVE the place where you are (say you're at a bar, and you're getting ready to go home or go somewhere else), it's even BETTER. In that case, say "We're going to leave... it was nice talking to you"... then turn away. Now, just after you break eye contact and turn away, TURN BACK and say "Hey!" She'll look back up, and be surprised... 2) Start With Something "Low Risk" ...as she looks up, ask "Do you have email?" in a calm, normal tone of voice. When she says "Yes", say "Great, give it to me, I'd like to talk to you again". Then pull out a pen, and hand it to her. As she's writing down her email address, just as she writes the @ symbol (in other words, in the middle), say "...and write your number there too...". Finally, tell her to write her name down as well. Why do it this way? Good question. -At first you're asking "Do you HAVE email?" This is a no-brainer. If she does (and most women do), she'll say "Yes". You're just treating the "yes" as if she said "Yes, I'll give it to you...". It's a smooth, easy way to ask a "low risk" question, and have a woman be the MOST likely to give you her information. -Email is considered "safe". I mean, what are you going to do, send her 100 emails a day? Ooooohhh, scary. -You're waiting until she's actually in the MIDDLE of writing down her email for you to ask her to also write her number down. This makes it FAR more likely that she'll give you her number. At this point she's already demonstrating to you and her that she's OK with you contacting her again... and since she's ALREADY writing, she's very likely to just KEEP writing... her number. 3) The "Do You Have A Card" Variation You can also ask "Do you have a card?" if you choose. This is a classy, low risk way to ask a woman for her contact information. Now, a lot of women DO NOT have cards, so you're going to need the follow-up for when she says "No, I don't have one on me"... which is "Well, invent one for me!". This is funny, charming, and smooth. Just take out a pen, and hand it to her. She'll know what to do. 4) Be Ready Probably half to two thirds of the time, a woman will just write down her email for you. It's AMAZING how easily women will give out their email addresses. But sometimes you'll meet with resistance. I can't go into all of the millions of possible scenarios, but I will talk about the most COMMON one. Probably a quarter of the time, a woman will say something like "I don't give out my email to people I don't know" or "I don't even know you" etc. This one used to REALLY stump me... until I found a simple solution... Here it is: Just point to the paper, and say "Write it down". If she keeps resisting, make a joke. Say "It's OK, just write it down. I'll only email you every five minutes for the next month." The SIMPLE "Write it down" works wonders. You'll probably overcome HALF of the "I don't give out my email/number" comments with this one simple answer. Use it. 5) Mentally Rehearse One of the greatest investments you can make in yourself is MENTAL REHEARSAL. Take some time to imagine exactly what it's going to be like when you ask a woman for her email/number. Close your eyes, and picture a situation. Imagine how you're going to be standing, what you're going to say, what she's going to say, how you're going to take out the pen and hand it to her, how you're going to answer any objections that she gives you. Don't wait until you're in the situation to realize that you don't know how to handle something! You'll realize all kinds of great stuff when you mentally rehearse. You'll be vividly imagining a great conversation, then you'll get to the part where you ask "Do you have email?" and she says "Yes", and you say "Great, give it to me, I'd like to talk to you again..." and as you mentally put your hand in your pocket you'll realize that you don't usually carry a pen with you! Or you'll realize that you don't carry paper with you. Or you'll realize that your pen is usually in your jacket, which is usually on the back of your chair, and not with you at the bar. When you mentally rehearse, you program yourself for success. Do it! 6) Don't Sell Too Far In Advance This is SUCH an important concept. Maybe even the most important thing I'm going to say. When you're getting a woman's email and number, DO NOT try to convince her to marry you on the spot! Don't "ask her out". Don't tell her that your mom is going to love her. Don't ask typical stupid questions like "Do you have a boyfriend"... and make it seem like you're qualifying her for marriage. No no nooooo! As a matter of fact, the ONLY thing you want to do is get her information. Many guys make the mistake of talking about going out on a date, being interested, etc. or tipping the woman off in some way that he's VERY interested in her. This creates pressure and resistance. There's ZERO mystery or tension created when you do this stuff. All you have to say is "I'd like to talk to you again". That's enough. And by the way, when you DO talk to her again, make sure you avoid the same mistake! Don't talk future and relationship and marriage then either. Just take things to the next step, which should be a simple thing like "Tea and stimulating conversation". One small step at a time, and don't sell too far in advance... ever. It only creates resistance and nervousness on the part of the woman when you hint that you're "interested" in a big way. So there you go... you've now learned how to get a woman's email and number within minutes of first meeting her. Use this stuff, it's taken me YEARS to figure it all out... And if you'd like to know what to do AFTER you get her email and number, I have some advice for you. Check out my free videos. Remember at the beginning of this email when I mentioned that I originally thought to myself that if I could get a woman's number fast, I would be "the man"? Well, I quickly learned that there is A LOT more to this than just being able to get numbers fast (although being able to get a woman's number in 2 or 3 minutes doesn't exactly suck)... Secret seduction technology. There are many steps between first meeting a woman and getting her to feel a POWERFUL GUT LEVEL ATTRACTION for you... and between her feeling that attraction and the two of you "getting physical". If you know all the steps, and how this all works it will likely go very smoothly and naturally. If you DON'T know all the steps, it will likely NOT go smoothly AT ALL, and you'll run into more problems than you can imagine. THEdateDR is a psychology major whose mission in life is to help guys more effectively date great women. He is also the author of the smash hit book, Secret Seduction Technology - http://www.datedr.info and several other products that can help men become more successful with women and dating. submitted by - Rocky
# 10 Being too much of a nice guy Have you ever noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted to "nice" guys? Of course you have. Just like me, I'm sure you've had attractive female friends that always seemed to date "jerks"... but for some reason they were never romantically interested in you. What's going on here? It's actually very simple. Women don't base their choice of men on how "nice" a guy is. They choose the men they do because they feel a powerful gut level attraction to them. And guess what? Being a nice guy won't make a woman feel that powerful attraction to you. And being nice won't make a woman choose you. I realize that this doesn't make a lot of logical sense, and it's hard to accept... but get over it. Until you accept this fact and begin to act on it, you'll never have the success with women that you want. # 9 Trying to convince her to like you What do most guys do when they meet a woman that they really like... but she's just not interested? Right! They try to "convince" the woman to feel differently. Well, I have news for you: You will never change how a woman "feels" when it comes to attraction! Never, ever, ever. You cannot convince a woman to feel differently about you by means of "logic and reasoning." Think about it. If a woman doesn't "feel it" for you, how in the world do you expect to change that feeling by being "reasonable" with her? But we all do it. When a woman just isn't interested, we beg, plead, chase, and do our best to change her mind. Bad idea. One that will never work. # 8 Looking for her approval In our desire to please women (which we mistakenly think will make them like us), we guys are always doing things to get a woman's "approval" or "permission." This is another horrible idea. Women are never attracted to the type of men who kiss up to them... ever. Don't get me wrong here. You don't have to treat women badly for them to like you. But if you think that treating a woman well means "always getting her approval and permission for things," think again. You will never succeed by looking for approval. Women actually get annoyed at men who seek their approval. Doubt me? Just ask any attractive woman if wussy guys who chase her around and want her approval annoy her. You can't buy your way to her heart... # 7 Trying to buy her affection How many times have you taken a woman out to a nice dinner, bought her gifts and flowers, and had her reject you for someone who didn't treat her even half as well as you did? If you're like me, then you've had it happen a lot. Well guess what? It's only natural when this happens. That's right, I said natural. When you do these things, you're sending a clear message: "I don't think you'll like me for who I am, so I'm going to try to buy your attention and affection." Your good intentions usually come across to women as overcompensation for insecurity, and weak attempts at manipulation. That's right, I said that women see this as manipulation. # 6 Sharing your feelings too early Another huge and unfortunate mistake that most men make with women is sharing how they "feel" too early on. Attractive women are rare. And they get a lot of attention from men. Most men don't realize this, but attractive women are approached in one way or another all the time. An attractive woman is often approached several times a day by men who are interested. This translates into dozens of times per week, and often hundreds of times per month. And guess what? Attractive women have usually dated a lot of men. That's right. They have experience. They know what to expect. And nothing turns an attractive women off and sends her running away faster than a guy who starts saying "You know, I really, really like you" after only one or two dates. This signals to the woman that you're just like all the other guys who fall for her too fast... and can't control themselves. Don't do it. Lean back. Relax. There's a much better way... # 5 Not "getting" how attraction works Women are very different from men when it comes to attraction. You need to accept this fact, and deal with it. When a man sees a beautiful, young, sexy woman, he instantly feels a sexual attraction. But does the same apply for women? Well, after studying this topic for over five full years, I can tell you that women usually have their "attraction mechanisms" triggered by things her than looks. Have you ever noticed that you see a lot more average and unattractive men with beautiful women than the other way around? Think about it. Women are more attracted to certain qualities in men... and they're more attracted to the way that a man makes them feel than they are to looks alone. If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that you feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman. But it's not an accident. You have to learn how to do this. And any guy can learn how. # 4 Thinking that it takes money & looks One of the most common mistakes that guys make is giving up before they've even gotten started, because they think that attractive women are only interested in men who have looks and money... or guys who are a certain height... or guys who are a certain age. And sure, there are some women who are only interested in these things. But most women are far more interested in a man's personality than his wallet or his looks. There are certain personality traits that attract women like a magnet... And if you learn what they are and how to use them, you can be one of those guys. You do not have to "settle" for a woman just because you aren't rich, tall or handsome. Let me say this again: If you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that you feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman. Keep the ball in your court... # 3 Giving up power Earlier, I mentioned that it's a mistake to look to a woman for approval or permission. Well, a similar mistake occurs when a guy gives his power away to a woman. Said differently, guys try to get women to like them by doing whatever the woman wants. And that's another bad idea. Women are never attracted to men that they can walk all over... Women aren't attracted to wussies! # 2 Failing to read dating situations Now I'm going to blow your mind... a woman always knows what you're thinking. Women are approximately 10 times better than men at reading body language. That's 10 times. I know, it might be hard to believe. But, for example, if you're out on a date with a woman, and you want to kiss her, she knows it. And if you don't know exactly what to do and exactly how to kiss her, and you just sit there looking at her and getting nervous, she won't help! And this goes for all aspects of women and dating... Approaching a woman, getting her number, asking her out, kissing her, getting physical... everything. If you don't know what to do in each situation, you will probably screw it up... and lose everything. And you know it. It is vitally important that you know exactly how to go from one step to the next with a woman... from the first meeting, all the way to the bedroom. # 1 Not getting help This is the biggest mistake of them all. This is the mistake that keeps most men from ever having the kind of success with women that they truly want. I know that guys don't like to make themselves look weak or helpless. We don't like to ask for help. Hey, I've been there myself. Let me tell you a little about how I figured out how to be successful with women... About five years ago, I became fed up with the fact that I didn't know how to approach, meet and get dates with the women that I was attracted to. It frustrated the heck out of me. One night I was out with a friend, and I saw a woman I wanted to ask out, but I just couldn't build up the nerve to do it. I can still remember that night... right on the spot, I made the decision to do whatever it took to learn how to be successful with women and dating. Well, after a lot of hard work and trying all kinds of crazy things, I finally figured it all out. I can now approach just about any woman and get her number almost instantly. I've dated models, I've dated actresses and I've dated nice, normal, regular girls as well. It has been a very rewarding experience. I no longer feel that sick, insecure feeling... the feeling that, because I don't know how to meet women, I might wind up alone. I know that anytime, anywhere, I can go out and meet attractive women. It seems that for every valuable tip out there on picking up women, there are two mistakes to avoid. Keep away from the 10 listed above and you'll up your success rate considerably. And to keep you on your toes, I'm now offering free videso ,which you can have delivered straight to your inbox once a week. THEdateDR is a psychology major whose mission in life is to help guys more effectively date great women. He is also the author of the smash hit book, Secret Seduction Technology - http://www.datedr.info and several other products that can help men become more successful with women and dating. submitted by - Rocky
Starting a conversation with an attractive woman can be a nerve-racking experience. In fact, many guys are so intimidated by attractive women that they avoid most females they don't know; in turn, missing opportunities to meet potential girlfriends every day. The solution here is to overcome your "knee jerk" reaction to avoid attractive woman and learn to approach them with confidence. Here are 10 tips to help you do it: Number 10 Approach her no matter what If you approach, you win -- no matter what happens. Most guys are too focused and concerned about a conversation going well and walking away with a phone number. This is a big mistake. Look at it this way: As long as you open your mouth and say something -- anything at all -- you're doing what 95% of guys can only dream about. Congratulate yourself the instant you start the conversation -- after all, you're already a cut above the rest! Once you've made this initial verbal contact, relax and enjoy the chat with her. Number 9 Ignore your excuses One of the best ways to move forward and start a conversation is to learn to ignore your own excuses: "She'll never go for me;" "She'll think I'm a slime-ball or a pervert;" "She's busy, I don't want to interrupt her.". All these excuses come from the desire to stay in your "comfort zone," and each one is complete BS. As soon as you notice these excuses in your head, stop thinking, go over to her and start talking. You'll be glad you did. Number 8 Screw up big time Are you a perfectionist? If so, work on restraining your need to get things just right (at least when it comes to the female sex). When you expect to have perfect interactions with women, you put too much pressure on yourself, which makes it harder to get off your butt and take action. Even if you mess up, be happy with yourself for taking the initiative. Number 7 Focus on how you'll feel if you don't talk to her One reason you hesitate to start talking to her is because it feels uncomfortable to take the leap. But the fact is, it's more uncomfortable not to. Think about it: If you approach her, you may be nervous at first, but before you know it, the conversation is over. And if you don't approach her, you'll wish you had, and you'll carry that regret with you for the rest of the day. Save yourself the agony and go talk to her. Number 6 Don't put undue pressure on yourself When most guys see a woman they'd like to meet, they immediately view her as a potential date -- which creates all sorts of pressure. Instead, look at the next woman you meet as an opportunity to work on your "skills." This "mindset shift" helps you to be less attached to the outcome; in turn, making you more relaxed and more likely to start the conversation. Don't forget: You also improve the chances of it turning out to be a fun experience for everyone. The only difference between success and failure is the number of attempts.. Number 5 Use fear as your signal to approach Learn to make fear your friend. Next time you're afraid to say something to a woman, realize that fear is a sign that you need to start the interaction. Using fear as a guide allows you to stretch your comfort zone, become a more confident guy and meet new women. Just get it done and you'll feel great! Number 4 Be courageous and you'll become confident How would you define courage? Is it having no fear of doing "scary" stuff? Actually, the correct definition of courage is "the ability to take action in spite of fear." The courageous man isn't the one who doesn't feel fear -- it's the one who can push himself to take action even though he is feeling afraid. The next time you want to talk to a woman and you begin to feel that nervous energy rushing through your body, see it as an opportunity to have courage and channel your fear to make the conversation happen. Your self-confidence will get an instant boost, and you might just meet a great woman in the process. Number 3 Don't stereotype Sure, every once in a while, a woman is going to act a little grouchy when you try to start a conversation with her. But don't forget, this is the exception, not the rule. Once you start approaching more women, you'll find that most are friendly as long as you don't act like a dumbass. So stop telling yourself that every woman will turn out to be snooty, because it's far from the truth. Number 2 Make the move Do you want to know a simple yet effective trick to get unstuck? Stop trying to figure out what you're going to say and just begin moving in her direction. On the way over, you'll naturally notice something you can comment on and use that to start the conversation -- no matter how simple it may be. The key is to say something to get the ball rolling and let things progress from there. Number 1 Grab every opportunity to talk to women Did you just miss a perfect opportunity to talk to a woman? No, you didn't -- it's never too late. Stop what you're doing, find her, and have the conversation you should have had earlier. You'll find it's no big deal and she'll be impressed that you went out on a limb to speak to her. MASTER your fear of picking up Apply all 10 tips listed here, and you'll be on your way to seducing women. Be cocky, be funny and, soon enough, you'll get more dates then you have time for. Now you have her undivided attention now what… submitted by - Rocky
I think that probably every man can identify with he following sequence: 1) Meet girl. 2) Get along well with girl. 3) Feel attracted to girl and think she is attracted to you. 4) Tell girl that you like her (after getting up the nerve). 5) Girl disappears. 6) Call girl 47 times, but still no response. 7) Finally girl turns up and says "I only like you as a friend and sorry if I hurt you". ...Ouch. I know it's a bummer, but you might take comfort knowing that this has happened to me and just about every guy I know MANY times. Let me take a shot at explaining what's going on here, and hopefully help you and the others reading this to avoid this kind of thing as much as possible in the future. From my perspective, there are a few main issues going on here all at once... 1) Women are complex and often illogical (so are men, but in different ways). 2) Women are attracted to men for reasons that most men either don't know, don't understand, or won't accept. 3) The way that women communicate isn't always as "direct and straightforward" as most of us guys would like. 4) It's difficult to un-do one of these situations once it has reached this point. 5) There are things you can do to avoid this kind of thing in the future. So, let's deal with these one at a time as they relate to your situation... 1) Women are complex and often illogical (so are men, but in different ways). Women act on emotion and intuition more than men. They don't do the "logical" thing as often as men. Women walk into Starbucks and order a "fat free" cafe mocha, and then get WHIPPED CREAM on top. No kidding. I see it all the time... Women will go through a full closet of clothing trying to choose something to wear to the supermarket, then conclude that "there's nothing to wear in here"... Women spend $200.00 on shoes that are going to be worn a few times... Again, man have their bizarre behaviors, and I'm not trying to "badmouth" women... but in my experience women are usually not very LOGICAL about things... and they're ESPECIALLY illogical when it comes to relationships. Men are perfectly logical. They want to have sex with everything. Women aren't. They only want to have sex with men who DON'T want to have sex with them. LOL! My point is that you have to put your ideas about how things "should" be OUT OF YOUR MIND. Start a new way of thinking about things based on REALITY and not LOGIC. 2) Women are attracted to men for reasons that most men either don't know, don't understand, or won't accept. As I like to say, "Attraction Isn't A Choice". We don't think about who we'd like to feel attractionfor, it just happens on it's own in most cases. But the thing to remember is that ATTRACTION has a pattern. It's like a combination lock or a puzzle. There is a way to create it if you know the "recipe". On the other hand, if you DON'T know the recipe, then you're not likely to figure it out by trial and error. And the reason for this -- again -- is because IT'S NOT LOGICAL. While men are attracted mostly to LOOKS, women are attracted mostly to PERSONALITY TRAITS. In your situation, you displayed the personality trait that I refer to as WUSSY a little too early in the game. Women generally aren't attracted to men who get too lovey-dovey and emotional too quickly. There's not mystery or challenge when you fall in love immediately. And when you call 31 times a day, it only makes the problem worse. What you need to do in these situations is LEAN BACK more and give her some space. Give her room to think about you and miss you. 3) The way that women communicate isn't always as "direct and straightforward" as most of us guys would like. If a woman wants to tell you that she isn't interested in you in a romantic way, she'll often NOT tell you as her way of telling you. In other words, she might just disappear for awhile. Or she might not return calls quickly. Or she might talk about other guys with you... Once again, you have to put the concept of pure, rational LOGIC out of your mind when it comes to the world of ATTRACTION. Women are subtle. They read into things and try to tell you things indirectly. Women don't generally take what you say at face value. They want to know what everything REALLY means. If you meet a girl, and after the first date you say "I really like you, you're beautiful and I have feelings for you" they think you said "I'm a Wuss because I fall in love too quickly". On the other hand, if you say "Good night, give me a call sometime" she'll think you said "You were kind of boring, and if you want to talk to me again you're going to have to call me". 4) It's difficult to un-do one of these situations once it has reached this point. Unfortunately, once a woman has "made up her mind" about a guy, it's usually VERY difficult to change that mind. If you're in a situation like this where a woman has said "I only like you as a friend", then you're best off going out and meeting some other women, and getting on with your life IMMEDIATLY! Don't wait. Get on with it. If you disappear from HER life, then turn up a month or two later... and you're dating a few other attractive women... she might see you in a new light. Jealousy is a VERY powerful motivator to women, and this is often what it takes to get a woman to see you in a new light once you've let out your INNER-WUSSY too early in the game. Point: Don't try to un-do it. Just get on with your life and quit obsessing over her. 5) There are things you can do to AVOID this kind of thing in the future. The most important step you can take is to LEARN HOW ATTRACTION WORKS! You need to learn this game so you know what's happening in future situations... and, most importantly you know what to do to make women feel attracted to you from the beginning (and, of course, how to NOT let your inner WUSS rear its ugly head too often). As you know, some of my favorite ways to do this are by being Cocky and Funny, teasing women, busting on them in a particular way, playing hard to get, etc. But if you want to learn how ATTRACTION works and to make it work for YOU, then YOU'RE going to have to go out and do it. No one else is going to do it for you. I did the trial-and-error thing. I tried all kinds of stuff. In fact, I've probably tried more different ideas for meeting women than anyone I know. The real shift towards success came when I started making friends with guys who were very successful with women... and then watching what they did in person. I found that these guys did things that THEY WEREN'T EVEN aware of... things that made women literally pursue THEM. I then took all of this information, and combined it with the other things I had learned... I worked like a mad scientist for a few years on this because I really wanted to get this area of my life figured out. Well, as you can imagine, I developed some pretty amazing techniques for meeting women, getting emails and phone numbers, taking things to a "physical" level, and everything in between. You have to do a lot of INNER work if you want to be the kind of guy who can keep an amazing woman. When I was on my own personal quest to learn how to attract women, I found that most of the materials available only focused on the OUTER game. In other words, they only talked about techniques. They said "Just go up to a woman and say HI..." but they didn't talk about HOW to say the words, or how to understand what the woman would be thinking when I did approach her... or any of the million other "INNER GAME" issues around meeting women. After spending a few years figuring this stuff out, I have realized that it is VITAL that a guy get his Inner Game together FIRST. Once you understand how and why women are attracted to certain types of men, and how the human "mating dance" works, you will SEE things differently. You'll understand things in a new way. It's like putting on a pair of 3-D glasses... and seeing things in a totally new way. Then, I think it's important to learn THE BEST "techniques" and actual strategies for meeting women...from where to go, to what to say, to how to take things to a "physical" level smoothly and without "rejection". THEdateDR is a psychology major whose mission in life is to help guys more effectively date great women. He is also the author of the smash hit book, Secret Seduction Technology - http://www.datedr.info and several other products that can help men become more successful with women and dating. submitted by - Rocky
A poetry contest by a poet for poets. First prize is $50. Send 3 poems max and a $ 5.00 entry fee to PO Box 2017, Fairfield, Ca.94533. Deadline is Dec. 31st, 2007. For complete submission rules, send an email to freelance@jmartinpoetwriter.com submitted by - juanita j. martin
With our Author-Originated Book Publishing method authors retain all rights to their work, enjoy royalties paid monthly, benefit from extensive distribution outlets, and enjoy the convenience of our generous bookstore return policy. Find out how our author-friendly book publishing method can take you from un-published writer to published author. In addition to our comprehensive book publishing method we offer extraordinary additional services, some of which are found no where else. From copyediting and promotional tools to mixed media book production (CD inside your book) and spanish language translation, you'll find all the support you need to customize your book publishing needs. Our free book, Become a Published Author, will tell you everything you need to know about achieving self-publishing success. Order or download your free Book Publishing Guide today by visiting our website at www.infinitypublishing.com. Good luck with your writing! submitted by - Rachel De Barros
Katie Szczech is responsible for bringing Your Mind, Body, Spirit Connection to life "The more you hate, the more you love." What an ironic statement. Whoever said those words must have been drunk. The bottom line is this: It is extremely difficult to like or love something that you despise. But what can we do to solve this dilemma? What if you're trapped in an environment that you don't want to be involved in? What if you're sick and tired of your job that you feel like puking every time someone mentions your work? Of course, you take inspired and motivated action to get out of your present rut and start living the life you've always dreamed of. Guess what? It's not going to be easy. You will have to come out of your comfort zones to discover potentials and opportunities waiting for you. You have to conquer your fear and take calculated risks. You have to stay focused and persevere despite the difficulties you will encounter. Success doesn't come easy. It takes heart and passion. It may also take some time before you can actually reap the fruits of your labor. But how do you actually survive this stage? This is the moment when you're working extra hard to reach your goals. This is also the instance when you're enduring whatever adversity hits you. For example, you're employed in a job that you hate. You know deep inside that you would not like to stay in the rat race throughout your life. So you decided to engage in a part-time business or to study night courses. Good move, my friend. So far so good. A few days later, time started running out for you. Your family complains that you've never spoken a word to them in such a long time. You're getting crazy over your very hectic schedule. Soon enough, your attitude changes negatively. You get mad and frustrated over the tiniest setbacks. You hate the world for all the misery it has brought upon you. Stop right now! That is not the way to go. You are attracting negative elements into your life. Yes, you have to work harder, dig deeper, and sacrifice more to attain your ambitions. But no, you don't have to hate the world and feel bad about your difficult situation. Remember the Law of Attraction. If you hate the world, the world hates you back. So what do you have to do? Learn to love your current situation. See all the positive sides of life. Be enthusiastic. Love your boss, your coworkers, your family, your friends, and even strangers that you meet on the streets. It may not be easy, but nothing is impossible with a strong will power. Just don't fall in love so much that you totally forget about your dreams. Balance is the key. Dream and take some positive action to move you toward your goals. Take it one step at a time. But while you're slowly crawling into the long journey to success, be patient and be as enthusiastic as possible. Don't hurry up too much that you totally forget how to enjoy life. One fine day, you will finally attain what you have always longed for. But when that day comes, don't spit back on the face of those who belittled you before. Stay humble. Don't look down on others when you see that you are becoming more successful than they are. Help them. Inject your positive aura into their personalities. When you give, you will yield back equal or greater rewards. Are you ready to begin the journey? Start it with the courage and desire to improve your life. Survive and go through it with persistence, enthusiasm, and positive thinking. Finish it with a resounding bang of accomplishment and with the desire to help others succeed as well. Your reading was brought to you by Nilla Spark. You can find more resources,information and grab your free audio and report on the law of attraction simply by going to - http://www.theofficiallawofattraction.com/supersuccess.html submitted by - Rajesh G
The Law of Attraction does not negotiate; it doesn't even distinguish between positive or negative deeds or thoughts, because it is immutable. The law responds to you from the viewpoint on your consciousness and where it is focused. Whether that focus is of benevolent thoughts or impure ones, the law responds matching those thoughts accordingly. Everyone is on equal footing, for it is your thoughts that create your reality. Yes, there is a social, ethnic, and cultural consciousness which is tied to a core basic belief system, but the Law of Attraction doesn't take any of that into consideration with no exceptions. So, be compelled to free yourself from any beliefs that have you stuck in a life of unhappiness, feeling unsuccessful, unworthy and unhealthy. Now, if you can wrap your mind around that concept, then you will understand the dynamics of the law at work when you observe good people depressed, confused, getting in to accidents and suffering from diseases. It is because they have somehow attracted that experience/situation into their lives directly or by default. Default attraction is denned as failure to perform or not being consciously aware of the negative/non-positive choices you are making. You may be thinking, "Oh, this can't be true, precisely what are you saying?" I know this may sound a little extreme but you will only receive the earthly equivalent of what you are vibrating no more and no less. Universal laws are not man-made laws. There is no one in the heavens judging the outcome of any experiences and neither is there anyone telling you what to think or when to think it. What we experience here on earth is an accumulation of man-made laws, morals, and religious concepts that the majority of us have agreed upon. The Law of Attraction, being a ubiquitous spiritual law, will in no way be regulated, compromised or adjudicated in a courtroom. The bottom line is that people who interact in toxic environments will sooner or later pull onto them the toxicity. Therefore, the disease whether or not it is just mental, can be passed on to anyone with whom the person comes into direct contact. Which then starts to pollute the observer's (co-worker, lover, spouse, friend) thoughts and comfort zone beyond their ability to think only healthy positive thoughts. No one walks around proclaiming they are in favor of diseases or an accident, but it is their polluted, chaotic thoughts that marinate in their mind and slowly seep into the body. As these negative thoughts systematically take hold within the human body, they have the ability to cause emotional and physical collapse (ergo stress, anxiety, and depression). The best way to rid yourself of all unhealthy thoughts is to never talk about or entertain in your mind lack, limitations, inadequacies, sickness, illness, unworthiness, not having enough, or being inept, and recognize that negative thoughts like greed, jealousy, and envy are powerful social diseases that may manifest in physical form if not curtailed. submitted by - Rajesh G
What if I see something that causes me heartache or if I don't want to think about some bizarre experience? If it is something you don't want, don't think about it, it's just that simple. For what you resist persist. The Law of Attraction cannot tell if you do not want the experience, especially since you keep thinking about it and wondering and predicting what you will do about it. Sensing that you want to keep creating more doubt, fear, anxiety, etc. because your energy is so focused on those types of experiences, the law says here's more. The more you concentrate on the unwanted object or experiences, the more energy you give it to grow. If it is something you truly desire, think about it to the point you can smell it, feel it and taste it and then "act as if you already have it in your life. The next time you get into your old car, "act as if it's that new luxurious one you desire. Every time you get behind the wheel only believe, smell, and think of it as that new one. Start play-acting and pretend. Imagine you have the job, car, etc. and actually sense/visualize how you feel; insert yourself into the vision. Why? Because the universe does not distinguish between what is make believe and what is real. When you are pretending to the point that you actually believe you are in possession of the object of desire, then the universe matches it if you have mentally aligned with it and have physically made room for it. How is this accomplished? Well, the universe doesn't have a mechanism to detect when you are pretending, so your consistent desirous thoughts about what you would love to experience is responded to as the real deal. Go to the car dealership and sit in that luxurious new car. Go to the jeweler and try on that diamond ring, and sit in on a corporate meeting and get that feeling of entitlement in your soul. Start pretending, act as if now. Use this exercise daily. Start small then build to a bigger desire, you will need to feel confident and comfortable when you are acting as if. Remember, the subconscious mind doesn't distinguish between the real world and a virtual one. Acting as if will cost you nothing and there is not a great deal of energy expended. You simply incorporate the process into your normal daily routine. Why pretend? Pretending is like having access to a virtual reality game without being hooked up to any electronic equipment. Believing it's a game; the suspicious, cautious conscious mind will not reject, analyze or judge any of these thoughts against your current belief system because it views this exercise as play. Just be like Angelina Jolie, Al Pacino, Tom Cruise or other great actors. They act it out and pretend that they're someone else according to their movie characters. You just need to act it our in your daily life. Do not be deterred if others think you are acting weird, for it is through understanding and practicing the principles of the law that you will receive everything you believe and desire. Yes, it is the Law of Attraction and one of itsreal secrets is "if you believe it, you can achieve it." Only then can you have, be or do anything in your life if you desire it. Believing and having faith is the foundation for any desire to manifest. submitted by - Rajesh G
eBooks from Deunant eBooks - publishers of eBooks,e-books, electronic books,downloadable books,audiobooks,all genres. Buy and sell electronic books here! submitted by - Jane Lane
The esteemed self is simply a reflection “in words” of embracing all those parts of yourself you may have buried in conditional ways form misperceptions, dramas or traumas created throughout life. It also allows you to become increasingly aware of the importance of understanding the words you use when defining yourself, others, and your life. This course will ask you who you are going to be? An esteemed self, which lives responsibly and unconditionally what you love; thereby, creating freedom, health, happiness, ease, grace and abundance? Or, are you going to be the dishonored self living in the illusion by what you “think” others expect of you; thereby, creating disharmony, confusion, lack and illness? Your esteemed self is the individual who cannot wait to get up in the morning to sing your song and dance your dance. The dishonored self wakes up dreading the day, denying the dance, and silencing the song. When being the esteemed self, you attract endless possibilities. You may not know this right now; it may even seem a little frightening to venture into the unknown, yet you are worth living what you love, so seize this opportunity. I was scared out of my tree that my esteemed self would not be accepted. I discovered what I was afraid of was not being accepted by others, it had to do with me not accepting myself through the reflection of others. Throughout the evolution of humankind, The Word has held power. When we speak with the power of The Word without completely understanding the words we are using, we create unconscious internal confusion within our subconscious mind. To become unconditionally and responsibly aware of the messages we are reaffirming both into our outer reality and into our subconscious mind, it is necessary to first understand the meaning and the power behind the words we use. Additionally, effective communication, either with self or with others, centers on understanding word usage. The example I want to use is the commonly used words to describe self, self-esteem. What really occurs when we use these words in this order most commonly used without a conscious awareness of their undertone? To understand the power behind the underlying meaning of what we project when we define self through self-esteem, I have chosen to use the most common form of defining those words, the American rendition of the English language, Webster’s New World Dictionary. Webster defines the hyphenated word “self-esteem” as: 1. belief in oneself. 2. undue pride in oneself. Let us go a little deeper and define Webster’s meaning of “undue.” Undue, by Webster’s definition, means 1. not appropriate, improper. 2. excessive, unreasonable. These dual definitions of one word (self-esteem) can bring about a conflict in our subconscious mind. Are we “dishonoring self” through undue pride or respecting self through belief in oneself? If we speak we desire self-esteem and our inner belief system is repelled by anything excessive or improper, how can we outwardly attain what we unconsciously and inwardly repel? Again, by Webster’s definition, if we state we have no or low self-esteem, what do we mean? Are we saying we have no belief in ourselves, or that we have high, improper pride? If we define self in terms of a duality definition, it becomes difficult to attain what is confusing in the subconscious mind. Indeed, any thoughts of duality continue conflicting internal messages. If one chooses to continue a separated and divided consciousness, choices are made to define oneself through words such as high and low -- High self-esteem or low self-esteem. If we choose to laminate self with these types of words in an effort to identify ourselves, to seek, to find, or to discover worth outside self, this continues the separation of self within confusion. In confusion, it is hard to remember that your worth comes from unconditionally and responsibly being yourself. Your worth is NOT outside you in what you do; it is the simple elegance of you being all you can be by allowing yourself to be yourself. When you are living the love of you, then you are truly in a “loving act,” expressing the Esteemed Self through the humility of service rather than an artificial sacrifice to service. In any artificial sacrifice to service, you forfeit your intention to share the honor of your love. To truly be in a loving act to serve, there must be no thought of serving, only doing what you love. If you are not doing what you love, and you think you are serving, this is a conditional act. Being the esteemed self, loving what you do, and sharing that with others, is unconditional. Thus, a truly loving act translates into living the gift of the Esteemed Self. The gift you came to share in service to others as you serve yourself completes a circle of oneness. To truly know and embrace all the different parts of self which are the Esteemed Self, let us begin by taking responsibility to understand the words we use. Since this essay is about Self-Esteem, I will continue with Webster’s definition of the word “self.” Self: 1. the identity, character, etc., of any person or thing. 2. one’s own person as distinct from all others. 3. one’s own welfare or interest. Esteem: 1. to value highly; respect 2. to consider, favorable opinion. After understanding the definition of these words, the simple choice of rearranging the words and placing ‘esteem’ first and ‘self’ second shifts the focus. Esteemed Self has a clear oneness focus by placing value and respect on one’s own person. The act of respecting self though clear choices, clear knowing, and an unadulterated knowing allows us to be love. When our intent is clear, we dramatically expand spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically. Our conscious understanding of how we respond to life increases and deepens our awareness in our current relationship with all aspects of life. To masterfully go beyond your current comfort level, you must allow yourself to be unconditionally responsible for your experiences. Responsibility through honest unconditional communication of thoughts and feelings without judgment or blame on self or others allows the esteemed self to be. Let us take this a step further by bringing into memory the universal truth I spoke of earlier, that we are all One. With this wisdom available to us, let us place it into working knowledge by choosing to focus on the value of respecting all the Reflected Selves of humankind through this unity with oneness. This type of focus creates compassionate understanding through the Esteemed Self expressed. Through honor, respect, and allowing love, we realize our existing wholeness. We remember that in truth, we are only self, spiraling outward as we expand our awareness to include all that exists as God/Man manifest. To know who we truly are, we choose experiences that unravel the mystery of self in the adventure of life. In each experience, we have a free will choice. We have the free will to choose oneness or duality (separation), conditional or unconditional. The Esteemed Self continues to expand at your level of courage to be yourself. No right or wrong, no lesser or greater, it is what it is in the moment of your expression in the journey of the life you have chosen. You will continuously accomplish amazing things for yourself as you demonstrate happiness, fulfillment, and total ease in the love of the adventure of life, as your Esteemed Self becomes the mirrored reflection and inspiration to others to remember and share their own love. Although remembering, knowing and living this important element of an Esteemed Self is vital and supports returning to living and being one with love, as you grow in awareness you will remember more and more that, in truth, there is only self, there is only love. Be conscious of the choices you make when defining self. How do the words you use affect your outer and inner realities? Do they support you in loving yourself or do they create the opposite? Choose to become aware of your words. All Rights reserved Veronique submitted by - Rajesh G
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